Exam Results/University Update

Saturday, 9 August 2014
Hello everyone! I guess it is time to write another update post about going to university and my exam results. I got my results on Tuesday and to be honest I'm a little disappointed with my results. Now if you've been following my blog for a while then you'll know that I've always been a straight A student. So opening my results email on Tuesday morning and seeing that I'd gotten straight Bs? I have to admit that it was a little bit disappointed. Bs aren't bad grades but I kind of had this thing about leaving school with a perfect record. Advanced maths was bloody hard. I spent so much time this year studying for it. It was definitely the hardest subject that I've ever sat which was weird because I really loved higher maths.

Getting a B in advanced higher maths feels like an achievement. But in chemistry and physics? A B feels like a bit of a failure. I got As during the year on tests and prelims so I'm just kind of left thinking 'what went wrong?'. The advanced higher sciences require you to carry out an investigation during the year. This is then marked out of 25 and the result is added onto your mark from the final exam. So I'm questioning whether this was where things went wrong. Like I could have done really well in the written exam(which is all I really care about) but then had a bad project and that could have brought my grade down. If I really wanted to I could go into school and ask for a break down of my marks but I don't really feel like I can face my teachers at the moment.

I guess one of the reasons that my results are bugging me so much is that I've always had the reputation for being the smart one and now I'm not. All the messages on my leavers shirt say things like 'you're so smart' and 'can't wait to see you win a Nobel prize' which are nice things to say to someone but I kind of feel like some people see me as a giant brain and nothing else. And that I'll only be remembered for being smart .If I had gotten an A in maths and chemistry then I would have been able to skip the first year of my course. I really wanted to because I'm doing a five year course so the idea of graduating in 2018 instead of 2019 is pretty appealing. My really solid group of friends was in the year above me in school and I felt so lost without them for my last year. I feel like I spent the year trying to fit in with a group of people who obviously didn't consider me to be part of the group. I guess I just feel like that if I skipped first year of uni it would make up for having a really bad 6th year. A 6th year that I kind of regret going back for.

Ok anyway that's my rant over. Please don't think of me as a massive moaner. I know that there were people that didn't meet their conditionals and that to them having B grades wouldn't be a bad thing. It just didn't sit with my own personal goals.

So university. It is now under a month until I move out and I'm very, very excited but at the same time I'm starting to get nervous about it all. I know that I will be fine and that I just need to relax and not worry about it too much. I've nearly gotten everything on my 'moving out for uni list'. I just need to get some frying pans, an alarm clock and a few decorations to make it feel a bit more homey. I'm thinking maybe some fairy lights and photos and a life sized statue of my dog. I've met two of my flatmates and have spoken to another on Facebook so now there's only one person that I don't know. I've also been looking for jobs in Edinburgh. My hunt hasn't been too successful but I have heard back for two or three interviews. I'm not relaxing until I have anything confirmed. Hopefully everything would fall into place. I think it would be great to be starting uni and starting a new job at the same time just to be like 'new place, new me'. Fingers crossed!

So that's what's been going on with me lately! Sorry for the massive ramble. If you actually read this whole post then give yourself a round of applause!

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